Storms in April

This painting started with a poem about anxiety. The poem has a realization that today can be magical if i enjoy the moments. It ends with the word tomorrow which is the looming anxiety of "what if". 

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The next stage of the painting was chaotic. Completely free form. Essentially i made mess trying to cover the poem. Metaphorically, the messy chaotic process is anxiety, trying to disturb the peace i found by living in the moment. 

My next step is to mute out this mess with white enamel; But after laying on a heavy layer of white still the chaos seeps through. Working on raw canvas has given me this element of not knowing how inks and paints will react. My goal was to mute the chaos, and find serenity in the painting... but the painting had a mind of its own.

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As the chaos bled through a layer of white enamel i saw the shape of a flower. This is when the flower emerged. I pulled it out with spray paint on top of other wet mediums and left the studio for the day. When i came back to the studio the next day a beautifully drippy flower had dried in the most perfect way. At this point I knew I was close to completing this painting.

 

I continued muting out parts of the poem with more layers of enamel until nothing was legible except of course the word "Tomorrow". As i completed the painting I felt as if the word tomorrow had taken a new meaning. When removed from the poem about anxiety and paired with the flower it changed from looming to hopeful. I decided to titled this work "Storms in April" 

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